it's 1 A.M. and i can't sleep.. [nothing new there]..

in the distance i can hear the sound of a train rocking by, tooting it's horn. i have always found comfort in that sound, and it soothes my soul even though i find it to sound like a lonely cry...

when i was growing up there was a train that would pass through our little town at just about 11P.M. every night. i think sometimes i would wait to fall asleep until i heard that, as if it was saying goodnight to me, and me alone..

it's funny what you remember from childhood, isn't it? the memories i have of raising my kids are somewhat different than the memories they have of growing up.

 

we had a huge cookout tonight with all of the family who live here, to celebrate my 2 son's birthdays earlier this week. after we ate, we sat around and one by one each of my kids starting saying "remember when..." and we'd all laugh.. but as i listened, i thought, wOw... that did happen but i seem to remember it from a different aspect than they do. why is that?

tonight's get together was really, really nice. the weather was perfect, the food was good, and more importantly the feeling of "family" embraced me throughout. after some people left, we gathered around and had a small bonfire in our fire pit until very late.

it was sooooo peaceful watching the logs burn, popping and crackling every now and then, the orangey glow of the flames.. it felt like soaking in a hot bath where the hot water surrounds you like a big hug... only drier!

alas, all good things must come to an end... everyone is in bed right now. the house is quiet, i still cant sleep... and i feel hungry. think I'll have some toast with sliced bananas on them... and a hot cup of tea. oh yeah, baby!