Diane and I just finished watching “the locator” with Troy Dunn… have you ever watched it? his life work is about reconnecting people who have been adopted with their bio families, and the episodes are SO touching, so full of pain, sadness, misunderstanding, yet they usually end with the joy of being reunited with each other. we love this show and try to watch it religiously.
one reason is because my 2 older kiddies were adopted. they became ours when they were 3 days old… so this kind of show means a lot to me personally. secondly, Nicholas's birthmother is one of our dearest friends now, and we love her so much. my son has so much love in his life that it just fills my heart.
Emily has contacted her birthmother but her situation is a bit different, as hers has written back to her but has not made an effort to meet Emily or share pictures etc.… and it makes me so sad for my baby girl because I want her to have as much love as she can but some things just don’t work out that way. maybe its for the best, maybe she has nothing to give Emily… it just is what it is for now.
but the third reason I love this show is because it just warms my heart to see happy endings, to see the other side of adoptions, and that we should never ever judge anyone for the choices they make along this line because there is always a reason. it’s usually for the baby’s best interest.. but even if it wasn’t initially, people’s hearts change over the years, as do their situations.. and they may come to regret what they have done.
I have not seen one episode that hasn’t been successful. and they aren't always babies… kids are placed for adoption at all different ages. I have always loved my two birth mom's for what they gave me, even before we received our son and daughter.. I prayed for god to bless and keep who ever they were going to be, safe and healthy.. and then for them to find peace in their decision.
and I will never think adoption is not about love. to me it’s the most selfless act of love, along with what must be the most painful of decisions to make. so when Troy the locator, reunites these people, it makes me cry… like. a. baby.
tonight’s episode was about a woman finding out she has a sister, and because of Troy, they met. both had always wanted a sister and did not have one. they had the same father. can you even imagine finding out you had a sister or brother in your adult years… specially if you had always longed for one? it just blows me away. I’m the mushy one of Diane and I, but even she cries at some of these episodes.
what I have learned through my own experiences of adoption and what I have learned along the way, is that even when you have a wonderfully loving family who loves you and raises you, it’s OK to still wonder who you look like, or where you really came from, and why you were placed for adoption. these are all normal feelings and questions and I believe everyone has the right to know. I don’t think it is wrong to wonder, I think it’s an innate need inside every one of us.