"...wE mUst bE thE chAnGe wE wiSh tO sEE iN thE wOrld..." K.G.


.....oh 2009 sure is starting off with a big bang, for me! i fell on ice coming out of work this morning between 2 cars as i was trying to open my car door. yep, it was quite the sight. first I'm there. then I'm not. face down and on my left arm. i count myself lucky to not have peed myself... i had my coat on and i was sore, but thought i could sleep it off.... did that work for me? HELL to the NO. i slept several hours until pain woke me up. my left arm was throbbing, burning, and radiating sharp pain from the shoulder to the elbow, and back again. i could hardly move that bad boy. AND i had no grip power with my hand. it was cold and tingly, just like a vibrator accidentally going off in your pocket, ya know? fuckin AAAAAAAA it hurt SO bad. i was in tears. after a few hours of trying to bear the pain, and irritatingly whining to my family, i had Diane take me into the E.R. cuz i thought i broke the humorous bone.
ANY ways... after x-rays and exams, no broken bone. no broken anything. however, (isn't there always a frikkin however, anymore...?) they saw arthritis in my shoulder, elbow, and wrist. and the doc said i have a "hematusion" from the shoulder to the wrist. (which is a nasty internal bruising to the tissue around my humorous.) it's already startin to turn pretty colors. how quaint is that.
i had to file an incident report since it happened in the parking lot at work, and i will be off work until i am healed. gotta go see my Dr. Monday and go from there. fucking shit-tards of America! if it ain't me back, or me ribs.... it's me arm.... why moi?
who knows how much work i will have to miss. i cant handle babies with a gimpy arm. the parents might not appreciate that.
i basically live from payday to payday. seriously. no shit. it's true. losing 2 nights of work, (yes, really, that is ALL it will take) will throw me way outta balance, my rent wont be paid, nor the bills, and i will end up living in a cardboard box downtown somewhere. i will need a very BIG box as 3 other people and a dog will be with me. oh. I'll need a box with a garage, for da car.... so i don't have to freeze scrapin snow off first thing in the morning... maybe i can get Martha Stewart to help me divie up some walls for privacy but i sure as hell don't know where we'll put the 62 inch plasma TV. (yeah, right, wish i did have that)
the only 62 inch plasma TV I can afford is a picture of the one i ripped out of a magazine. and we all sit around jus starin at it, wishin n hopin.... thinkin n prayin.... pretending to click through the imaginary channels... with the imaginary remote, but ya know what? that bastard who sells SHAM WOW is STILL on every commercial.... i don't get it.... who is he, anyway? and where did he hatch from? he seems to be very tight with the Germans, though.
consequently, after the suicidal loss of my earring to save a wedding band, Diane's palaver with her finger, the pain i have been in with my 3 bulgy discs, today's fall, and my it-will-only-get-worse arthritic crippled body- I'd say i have had a wonderful end and beginning of the new year.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhh i 'm SO tired of obstacles.
(would much rather have popsicles).

how YOU doin'?



SkylersDad said...

Is there a Sears store nearby? I hear they have the best boxes for living in. At least that's what I heard, I am heading over by mine later for a scouting report.

ChiTown Girl said...


random moments said...

I feel sort of bad having a giggle over your misfortunate slip incident. But its your fault, you brought the funny to it!

You could always turn tricks for extra cash until you're back at work. Some guys like chics with one arm.

Sorry, that was inappropriate.

I would hang outside of Lowe's or something until you see someone purchasing a refridgerator and ask if they'd be willing to donate the box it came in. Its a start.;)

C said...

hahahaha you guys! if ya cant laugh at life's meanderings, what the hell CAN ya laugh about? thanks for the smiles.
sky, make sure the boxes you check out 4 moi have at least 2 windows. with 3 of us and a dog in there, flatulance will naturally occur and we will need the ventilation.

and random, i guess i COULD turn tricks at the truckstop... i used to be really good at pullin rabbits out of hats, and sawing people in half.... ;)

thanks, clippy. you for sure know what its like...


Busy Bee Suz said...

He are just having some crappy luck.....did you tempt karma or something?????
i do hope you feel better...and soon.
The cardboard box part is funny..for your car...for your pretend plasma.
take care and remember it can always be worse. right?

Gina said...

i get my quotes form all differnt places. I have found alot of them from the book " The Secret", it's actually a pretty good lil book :)

kimber p said...

I shouldn't laugh at a strangers misfortune, but you made it so funny..lol

I found you thru adlibby's blog.. :)

C said...

welcome kimber... always wonderful to meet new people on here. i will be checking out your blog, as well.


Midwest Mommy said...

Oh that just sucks and sounds painful.