it's Christmas time in the city....

.....Christmas, Christmas time is near,

time for joy and time for cheer,

we've been good so please don't pass...

hurry Christmas, hurry fast.....

i want a plane that loops and loops..

me, i want a hula hoop.....

(the chipmunks)

when i was a little girl, that was my favorite

Christmas song. i knew it by heart,

and i felt the Christmas spirit

fill me up because of it.

the magic i felt when i still thought there

was a Santa, is what made it special to me.

one late night on Christmas eve,

i woke up suddenly to some noise i

heard downstairs. so like any little kid would do,

i snuck down onto the stairs to see what

was happening..... i saw in disbelief

that my parents were putting

wrapped presents under the tree-

i just couldn't believe my eyes...

i immediately filled up with such

disappointment that i felt like my heart

would explode in pain. i ran crying

back to my bed.... of course my parents

came right up in an attempt to comfort me

but all i could say through my tears was

"you lied to me" "i hate you"

and other things along those lines.

i don't remember much after that.

but i do however remember how crushed

and betrayed i felt inside.

i must have been 4 or 5 years old.

consequently, when we became parents,

David and i vowed to always be honest

with the kids. and so we were.

we told them the story of Saint Nicholas

having such a big heart back in

the old days, that he went around leaving presents

for the children in orphanages, as they had nothing.

and he did this on the night that Jesus was born,

to celebrate his birth. so every Christmas,

we made Jesus a birthday cake,

a birthday card, sang him happy birthday,

and gave gifts in his honor.

eventually we incorporated how the story

evolved into what it is today. that seemed

to work for us, but i got alot of flack from friends

and family through the years because of

course it conflicted the standard "Santa/Reindeer"

philosophy that most people promote today...

as i say that, i guess i just realized that i have

pretty much gone against the grain on most

things in my life. my kids have had to endure

my sometimes "unique" (OK, OK, weird)

parenting techniques and i don't know if i ruined

anything for them in doing so.

i was just trying to save them from

the crushing betrayal i felt when i

found out there was no Santa,

but in doing so, did i rob them of

believing in magic, even for just a little while...?

i haven't even started to do my shopping yet,

so as soon as my back is better, i will have to shop

like a wild woman....sorta like Wilma Flintstone

when her and Betty Rubble go shopping and yell,

CHARGE IT! CHARGE IT!

yep. i will be like Wilma and Diane can be like Betty.

(just as long as we don't have to kiss Fred and Barney...heehee)

whatever your beliefs are,

may this season bring you love, joy,

happiness, good health, and peace.

...and here's to a safe shopping season.

CRP